I absolutely love baths, spas, hot springs, onsens – you name it. The joy and peacefulness of soaking in the tub for hours until getting dizzy due to the change in blood pressure is somewhat become my guilty pleasure.
When I was in Turkiye, I had 10-15Km walk each day so the idea of visiting a Turkish Bath or they called it Hammam in middle eastern- was irresistibly tempting.
While strolling around the downtown area of Istanbul, we stumbled upon the big signage called ‘Turkish Bath Hammam. We excitedly entered the place and signed up for a one-hour bath including massage session. My expectation was so high, as I had always desired to experience the famous Middle Eastern Hammam as I had missed the opportunity in Morocco back in 2016.
Upon entering the lobby area, the atmosphere appeared rather dim and dodgy. Obviously this place in the need of renovation or at least a maintenance.
An elderly man, handed me robe and slippers and guided me to the changing room that looks messy and filthy for a tourist-friendly area. Nevertheless, I swiftly changed into the robe and left my belongings in the room. So apparently this is a private changing room with a key to keep our storage during the bathing session.
The same elderly man knocked on my door, murmuring something that seemed to indicate I should follow a woman to the bathing area. I followed the woman to an even darker and more humid room in another part of the house where I saw an elderly Turkish woman, draped in a wrap, stood there. She did not speak English so she gestured for me to lie down on the marble bed (that surprisingly felt so cold), creating an awkward and slightly eerie atmosphere, reminded me of some sacrificial scenes in the movie.
She proceeded to douse me with warm water from head to toe, though the experience felt more like a forceful watering than a gentle bath. She then vigorously scrubbed my entire body, followed by another thorough rinse. The rapid and robust scrubbing, hasty rinsing, and lightning-speed soapy and slappy massage left me bewildered. I had impression of being treated like a large animal in need of cleaning before being butchered. LoL. Does Turkish bath really treat customer like this? I wondered.
She gave me signal to move from the marble bed to a small chair in the corner, I sat there uncomfortably waiting for what’s next?! Apparently it’s turn to hair washing – or head washing? I don’t know. Because she washed my hair with surprising roughness, as if she was dealing with her naughty grandchild who refuse to bath. Still confused by the entire process, I anticipated another unexpected turn, only to be informed that it was all done. LoL. “Finish!” She confidently said. I was like, wait… that’s it? It’s not even 30 minutes!
I was tempted to confront the situation, but I decided to hold it, considering my undressed state. If the confrontation went unexpected, I did not want to escape the place half naked. Lmao. When I left the bathing room, to my surprise, she called me over and giving me gesture for a tip, leaving me even more speechless. I signaled back to her that indicates I will give the tip later after I get change. Which of course I did not give her, duh!!
The place was definitely a scam. And I am way more convinced when later on I found out how Turkish Hammam supposed to be. They should have put me in the sauna first before the bathing process, and the marble bed supposed to be warm, not plainly cold like I had.
I always laughed my ass off every time I remember that bizarre first Hammam experience. Too bad I don’t have pictures to show it since it’s a bathing place and I thought it would be a normal and pleasant one. Anyway, I’m still down for the real Hammam one though!
